Saturday, August 25, 2007

Going Home

I can't believe my time in Zambia has come to an end. Early tomorrow afternoon I will be getting onto a plane which will be the first leg of my trip home. As of August 27th, I will be in Canada. After that, it's a few days of EWB reintegration training and then I will be fully back into normal life.

I don't know how I feel right now. My last week has been pretty crazy. On Saturday the 18th I traveled to my old community to play some final songs on the guitar, have one more awesome lunch, and say far very hard goodbyes. That was only the beginning. Sunday was a few more goodbyes at work, and following that on Monday I had to say goodbye to some of my host family, to the rest of my co-workers, and to as many other of my friends and acquaintances as I could manage.

Sitting with Elias on my last weekend.

On Tuesday morning I said my final farewells, and walked with Elias (co-worker, ex-host, best friend) to board a bus to Luanshya. From there it was about 7 hours and 4 buses to meet my friend Kate (another Junior Fellow) in Lusaka.

I've heard from past Junior Fellows at UNB that their worst culture shock was not going back to Canada, but going from their home communities to the Capital city (in their cases, Accra, Ghana). For me, this was definitely true.

My friend Kate was doing some food shopping so I met her at the Super Spar grocery store at Lusaka's fanciest mall, the Arcades Shopping Centre. As soon as I arrived there, I didn't really know what to do. The Super Spar would be right at home in the suburbs of any large North American city. It's absolutely gigantic and was very confusing for me. The act of taking vegetables, putting them in a plastic bag, weighing them on a scale, printing out a label, and then taking them to a cash register, instead of just paying a woman on the street a few thousand Kwacha, was almost too much for me to handle without subsiding into a confused state of disbelief (manifested by me laughing and making pointless statements to Kate about how confused I was). The whole time we were shopping I was a bit in a daze, unsure of what really to make of the whole situation.

Grocery store in Lusaka.

I have been back to Lusaka before during my placement, but this time was worse. I had become very used to living in Mpongwe by this time. My vocal mannerisms, casual language skills, and general ease of interaction had grown in my final month in ways they never had in the first two. By the time I left, I felt truly comfortable in almost every situation in Mpongwe, rather then feeling confused and unsure of myself like I had previously. Then all of a sudden I was ripped out of that lifestyle and found myself back in the big city.

The problem wasn't really that I couldn't adjust; I've lived in cities my whole life and am quite comfortable with them. The problem was I didn't want to adjust. I've spent 3.5 months trying my hardest to live like someone from Mpongwe, to speak like someone from Mpongwe, and all of a sudden, all of that effort no longer mattered. It wasn't that bad in Lusaka, where many of the same mannerisms I learned still applied, except that I knew it was only going to keep getting worse as I moved closer to Canada. In a very short time, I was going to have to give up all the features of my Zambian personality I've worked so hard to develop while I've been here.

The few days after that first night were a lot better. I had my final meeting with my partner organization (OPPAZ) and everything went very well. After that, I went for 1 night to visit EWB-UNB co-founder Jen Dysart and her boyfriend Slady in Monze. Jen has been in Zambia for something like 2.5 years since she graduated, working on an EWB long-term placement with WaterAid Zambia. She has a really cool life carved out in Monze, and is doing some pretty cool work and research there; it was really nice to see her.

The next morning, myself and some of the other EWB volunteers did something that our co-workers, friends, and aquaintaces had been telling us that we had to do before leaving Zambia: we went to Livingston and paid a 1 day visit to Victoria Falls. I have to say it was absolutely incredible. I will post some pictures as soon as I can. I can definitely see why it's been labeled for so long as one of the 7 Natural Wonders of the World.

Victoria Falls

So now, after that awesome visit, I'm back in Lusaka, with less than 24 hours left in Zambia. Am I excited to get back to Canada? It's a tough question to answer. I'm excited to see friends, to see family, and to enjoy a comfortable and stable life while I finish my last two semesters of university. However, I am also apprehensive about how I will fit in, how I will deal with things, how I will be able to express what I've experienced in Zambia with people back home. All in all though, in a lot of ways I am looking forward to being back in my regular life.

Now for the other question: am I excited to leave Zambia? The answer is a strong no. I love this country. I love the people, I love the food, I love the lifestyle. I will miss so many things that I can't even begin to describe them. Of course, there are some changes that will be nice. The first time I walk down a street and no kid yells "how are you" at me from 100 meters away, I will enjoy it very much. But those things are very superficial. Realistically, I feel like I could easily stay in Zambia for much longer. I'm almost sure I will be back, if not here, than somewhere in Africa. The only questions are when, and how.

Until I'm back in Canada, I wish everyone a good last days of summer. I'm looking forward to seeing all of my friends and family as soon as possible.

Take care everyone,

Owen

2 comments:

Anonymous said...

Safe trip home Owen
~Catherine

Bryn said...

Owen,

Thank you so much for consistently writing so openly and honestly. Your blog has been a fantastic read throughout the summer and this last post has touched me (and I'm sure many others) in a way I'm not going to even attempt to articulate. So much that I identify with in here. I'll admit returning was a rough go for me at times, but as you know it gets better with time as I've learned to adapt, as I'm sure you will too.

Have a safe set of flights home and take care of yourself. Can't wait to see you in a couple weeks...


Take care,
Bryn